Dear Readers,

I now consider this blog to be my Juvenelia. Have fun perusing the archives, and find me at my new haunt, here.

Sunday, August 03, 2008

No, Maureen, No!!!

You are not even allowed to utter the words "Mr Darcy." It's so wrong on so many levels, akin to listening to Chris Matthews quote the bard. This column, to use the parlance of our internet age, is made of fail.

I imagine Maureen Dowd thinks of herself as a modern-day Austen. But she would need far subtler, more clever and more compassionate prose to reach the heights of Jane's pinkie toe when it comes to measuring great female satirists.

Although MoDo's column does prove the point that some of Austen's biggest fans are people whom she would mock most joyfully. Mo's seriously lady-Catherine-esque in terms of haughty judgmental attitudes, with a strong dash of Marianne Dashwood's bad taste in dudes.

Can you imagine a character named "Ms. Dowd" in an Austen novel, snapping at all the men to be more manly, the women to be more reserved, even while she herself, by being so outpoken, transgresses the boundaries she assiduously patrols?

Furthermore, when it comes to her own romantic prospects, I can just picture imagine Ms. Dowd bemoaning "It is a pity that there are no men suitable enough for me. It seems that every eligible bachelor whom I admire, the sort with good property in the neighborhood and a fine figure on horseback, has seduced a young women of not-yet-fifteen. I cannot for the life of me fathom it."

Meanwhile, the real Mr. Darcy sits nearby, too feminine, too sensitive, for Ms. Dowd's tastes.

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