Dear Readers,

I now consider this blog to be my Juvenelia. Have fun perusing the archives, and find me at my new haunt, here.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Back to the Grizz-ind

Yo, yo, yo! I am SO back. It's been a long, drowsy hiatus for fellow-ette. I must confess to being lulled into catatonic oblivion due to the abnormally warm... and moist... weather. And they called Al Gore crazy! Well, who's laughing now, evil corporations? Who's laughin now?

...No one, because we're all going to be killed by a rapidly descending second ice age a la The Day After Tomorrow (or we'll be under water...or we'll start sitting on our porches fanning ourselves and drinking juleps... which is potentially the worst).

Speaking of "The Day After Tomorrow," that modern cinematic masterpiece, how hot was Jake
(I'm funny, but my material sucked compared to Justin's and for that, SNL needs new writers) Gyllenhall during his opening monologue on SNL this weekend? Answer: real funny! I love men in dresses.

Oh, and speaking of modern cinematic masterpieces, the Golden Glizzobes were t'other night in case you didn't know. Personally, there's nothing fellow-ette loves more than snuggling under a blanket with her man of an evening, gazing upwards, and watching them stars come out. But this time, some of them lost their glitter. I forget from awards show to awards show how utterly vapid, self-important, and deluded most Hollywood folk really are. That's why we don't listen to them, we look at their glossy pictures and read snarky commentary from our favorite Us Weekly contributors. How soon we forget.

But just as we were about to doze into oblivion, with nary an asteroid spotted, Sacha Baron Cohen saved the day. His speech, here (sorry for the youtube ghettoness).

Other thoughts on the Globes:

*Warren Beatty: hotter when he's rapping and macking it with Halle Berry than when he's bantering with a sloshed Tom Hanks.
*Meryl Streep: really, really, really, loves herself. Who wouldn't with all that talent? (gagging noise)
*Sienna Miller: I think she actually might be the soulless bitch I've often imagined. She was rubbing Bill Nighy's shoulder in a really sycophantic, pretentious way.
*Ah-nold: Lo-ser.
*Jennifer Hudson and America Ferrara. I heart you. And probably just mispelled your names. Forgive me.

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